I'm not scanning through 32 pages, he got suspended for weed?
I'm not a Lavin apologist, but how is this his fault? If this is true, this bozo goes out and gets high before his (probable) only NCAA Tournament?? What the eff was/is he thinking?
Was the Pittsburgh strip club incident at least partly Jarvis' fault?
This is what it's come to? It's not Obekpa's fault? He smoked the weed. It was an instant gratification move on his part. I'm assuming there was no gun to his head and considering he's the only one suspended, he didn't puff it with anyone else on the team.
I wouldn't miss Lavin one bit, but blaming him for this is a mistake. CO made a stupid decision, one he'll have to live with the rest of his life.
I blame him more for the culture then for the actual act. There's been a pattern.
I don't even know what to say to this. Unless Lavin rolled it and shotgunned into his mouth or packed the bowl and said "smoke this ish or else," I'm not blaming him.
I'm sorry. People have to still be accountable for their own actions. I know society always needs a scapegoat, and God knows Lavin can be blamed for other things (or his inability to coach properly) but this is ALL Obekpa's fault.
He smoked (allegedly, I guess), he knew what was at stake, and he had his greatest game ahead of him and HE STILL DID IT. Not Lavin, OBEKPA did it. He cost himself and, probably, cost the entire team. Selfish. Point blank
Agree with everything you're saying other than to give Lavin a complete pass on this. When my kids-20 and 16 years old-do something stupid I blame them, but I also take partial blame as the parent. So maybe its just my perspective on things.
It's not only what he did, but when he did it. He gets caught doing this in June after school is over, it doesn't bother me so much. Even in April or May after the season is over. But now he has affected the outcome of their season, and that's not forgivable. If any of my kids at that age do something like that, I'm not to blame, and I certainly would hold them fully accountable - not their roommates, friends, teachers, or coaches. Put the blame where blame belongs, and you're a better parent. Take some of the blame, and you're giving them a crutch.
Beast I said pretty much the exact same thing about the timing of this in another post. FWIW while I take some of the blame when my kids screw up, I don't share that with them. If my kid(s) continually screw up then the way I see it I didn't do such a good job as parent. But as I mentioned before, maybe that's just me.
I've always said to my kids, half seriously, before you get in the car with someone who is under the influence or feel unsafe in any way, call me. No matter where I am I will come get you or make sure you are safe. On the other hand, I've told them if they ever get arrested, don't call me.
Monte, I understand what you are saying, but as parents we are only one part of our children's environment, and not responsible for their actions. You are responsible for teaching them right from wrong, for providing for them opportunities that perhaps we didn't have, and for disciplining them when they step out of line. If you are a poor example, as in do as I say but not as I do, then, yea are somewhat accountable when they do some of the things you do and it gets them in trouble. But at some point, you're not to blame. I have friends who have worked hard as parents, and have problem children - not their fault. On the other hand, almost all of my social activities revolve around my family. I rarely go to an SJU game without someone in my family, and that's the best part of it for me.
