Jokes to ease the tension

Mickey and Minnie Mouse are going through a divorce. Mickey’s attorney said to him……. Look, I can’t get the judge to grant you a divorce over your wife’s mental issues…… to which Mickey replied…….I never said she had mental issues, I said she was f&@king Goofy.
 
Superman and Batman were having a conversation. Batman asks, what do you do for excitement in your spare time? SM says, I like flying around watching people in their back yards and had an interesting experience last week.

I was flying around and saw Wonder Woman laying there naked on a lounge chair her legs spread open and she was moaning. I figured what the hell, here’s my chance to swoop down and go for a ride.

Batman replied, I bet she was surprised…… to which SM said….. NOT AS SURPRISED AS THE INVISIBLE MAN. 😂👍
 
A golfer comes across a talking frog. The frog croaks "9 iron" and so the golfer picks his 9 iron and shoots a perfect shot, so the golfer picks up the frog and carries it to the next hole. The frog says “1 iron”, so the golfer hits a 1 iron, and makes a hole-in-one.

The frog says, "I'm 16-year-old blonde princes", if you kiss me I will make love to you every night for the rest of your life". The 60-year-old golfer says" at this point in my life, I'd rather have a talking frog"
 
Spocky Ramone said:
A golfer comes across a talking frog. The frog croaks "9 iron" and so the golfer picks his 9 iron and shoots a perfect shot, so the golfer picks up the frog and carries it to the next hole. The frog says “1 iron”, so the golfer hits a 1 iron, and makes a hole-in-one.

The frog says, "I'm 16-year-old blonde princes", if you kiss me I will make love to you every night for the rest of your life". The 60-year-old golfer says" at this point in my life, I'd rather have a talking frog"
Click to expand...
I know another version of this joke but it is much longer and no way I’m typing it all out here lol. But it’s funny so if anyone wants to hear it ask me when we meet up in person. It’s a good one.
 
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